Thoughts On Wednesday

Long Nights Alone

After A Fashion by Ctopher
4 min readFeb 24, 2022
Photo by Stephen Leonardi on Unsplash

The Problem

Days are long. The isolation, solitary confinement, and lifestyle kind of suck. Seems we should all be thankful for what we do have. We have to work to put some real beauty back into life. Before it is too late.

Solutions

We have to work to put some beauty back into the lives of those who are alone, hurting, and feeling like life isn’t worth living. We have to be kinder, we have to be better people. Life it seems, has everyone in a trap.

Feeling out of sorts these days. Trying to get my thoughts and feelings to align with the actions I want to take. Not sure what I really want yet. I want life better, and wanted some friends to spend time with doing fun stuff. Seems that option, has been denied to me. After having spent the last five years in nearly solitary confinement, I long for someone to spend time with me.

The system of the world, will tear you down. The junk the matrix tries feeding your mind, they seem to have a pipe right inside your very head. Trying to block the noise out isn’t really possible. Somehow things have to change. Feeling lost in the dead sea of ether. No one seems to care. Maybe, they have a better connection than I do? I doubt it.

I’m tired of dealing with the way that I feel. Tired of the fact, no one will spend the time to really talk with me, about what I want to talk about. There is plenty of people, that will talk “To” me, like I’m their warm sack of shit. However, the people that will talk with me, like I’m a real person, near zero.

This causes some problems. It makes all this feel very unreal. They don’t seem to care about that. They are too damn dumb to think. Pity. Wish there was a way to make them reason. I’ve given up on the human race. I’m not sure if any of them, have what it takes to be more. I’m only doing so well these days, and my end will come. One of these days, I will be gone. They will have to make do without me. I doubt, anyone here will miss me. They don’t know me, and they don’t seem to care to know me. Maybe, it is best this way.

Needed love, and kindness. Needed a life. Feeling like, damn it. The life I do have, seems to be seriously out of balance. Feeling like, something should have been done to make life better for everyone. They don’t seem to care. I think, that is a wrong way to behave. They think, nothing of it.

The lives they live, seem so boring. They seem to really enjoy those lives. I think it is good they enjoy those lives. However, I want to be able to enjoy my life, the way I want to enjoy living. Living someone else’s life, isn’t really my idea of what living is about. And, I’m not living my life. There is reason to believe, I have not reached 5% of my potential. That is really sad. It makes me want to do something with my life. But what?

They won’t let me live. They won’t let me be myself. They frown on everything I am doing, regardless of what motives there are behind them. I’m treated like nothing I do matters, or is relevant. I’ve become a misfit in this world. Go the longest without, and misbehave the biggest.

Needed real love. I’m tired of living the life they want. I want to live my life better. It should be possible, they have however set the situation up; no one will be successful without some help. They don’t want people to be happy. They limit people from having love, or affection. They control the supply of love, because there would be chaos if they couldn’t. They make everyone feel this level of disdain for each other. It is about control. If people really had love, and did what was best, this shit would change.

Conclusion

Stop being emotionless sacks of shit. Show some love for people. Give a damn, and love them. Help them get what they need, and make life better for everyone. Can you read my mind? Maybe if you read between the lines, you might know something. Don’t read too much into it though. I write pretty strait forward. Read the rest of my articles in the site: After A Fashion!

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